Howdy ladies, you can call me shark 'cause I can smell that menstruation from here. Hey ladies, are your bellies a white van? 'Cause I'm tryna put some kids in it. Sup! @ZACH.JUSTICE
Christie My mom and I went to the store and we ran into my dad buying flowers for her. 😠WTF FACTS @facts.wtf That's his story and he's sticking to it.
7 year old me bugging my dad as he's processing the fact that he just got laid off to show him a new bionicle I made (it's the same one from before but I gave it a new mask and feet) I realize this moment may not be the most convenient for a heart to heart. But...
When I was 22 I took my 21 yr/o roommate to the ER and when the doctor walked in he pointed at me and said "Mom?" so I responded "What about my mom?" and then he said "No, I mean are you her mom?" and I have never fully recovered from that moment.
What's the worst thing you can say in an elevator full of people? True story, my mom and dad were in a crowded elevator while my mom was very obviously pregnant to the point of bursting. I guess she looks at my dad and says, "When are you going to tell your wife about me?" My parents are happily married; she was just pranking him. My dad said it wa
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